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By Someone Who’s Been There Let’s talk tough love. Sounds noble, doesn’t it? Like something your grandpa might’ve said while pulling up his bootstraps: “They need a little tough love!” It conjures images of firm discipline, stern lectures, and a guiding hand through life’s storms. But in practice—especially when applied to addiction, mental illness, or trauma recovery—tough love often morphs into something far more brutal: abandonment disguised as care. Here’s the problem: tough love can become fanatical. In many treatment settings, it translates to cutting people off, evicting them, or letting them “hit rock bottom.” And what does that really...

Before I started this journey, a therapist once gave me a creative idea: “Since you’re an artist, why not draw every time you want to smoke?” At first, it made perfect sense—redirect the urge into something expressive and positive. But as time went on, I found it wasn’t so simple. The cravings got stronger, and to be honest, one of my main art projects was recently rejected. That rejection knocked the wind out of me. I felt frustrated and started distancing myself from art altogether. So instead of picking up a pencil, I found myself reaching for a cigarette again....

It saddens me that so many people won’t hear my case about tough love. If you dealt with the homeless population the way I have—face-to-face, eye-to-eye—you might see the other side. Tough love might sound like a solid solution from a distance, but up close, it looks more like abandonment. When applied to those with mental illness or addiction, especially, it becomes less a tool of healing and more a sentence. I’ve seen it firsthand. I quit working with the homeless as an artist because they kept dying. Not metaphorically—literally. Usually within three to five years. This isn’t about “happy...

This weekend at WonderCon 2025, fans of comic books, pop culture, and heartfelt storytelling will be treated to something truly special: Dan Joyce, the creative genius behind the much-anticipated autobiography, Have You Taken Your Meds?, will be at the convention to promote his powerful and honest journey. For those who may not yet be familiar with Joyce, he is a prolific writer, comic artist, and mental health advocate. His upcoming memoir, Have You Taken Your Meds?, chronicles his struggles and triumphs with mental illness, the power of self-advocacy, and the importance of seeking help when necessary. It's a raw, vulnerable...

Now that I’m trying to quit smoking—and actually managing to go significant chunks of time without a cigarette—something odd (and kind of messed up) has started happening. The smokers around me, the ones who know I’m trying to quit, often give me my first cigarette to get started again. They don’t do it out of generosity or malice exactly. It’s something deeper, more psychological. When someone in the circle quits, it forces the others to look at their own addiction. And that’s uncomfortable. So instead of facing it, they’d rather you join them back on the bench, lighting up like...