I’m still smoking.
It’s not that I don’t want to quit — believe me, I do. But addiction isn’t a fight against an outside enemy. It’s a war within your own walls, a battle between the part of you that wants to heal and the part of you that clings to the comfort of old habits.
And it’s a hard fight. Harder than I ever wanted to admit. Especially in this environment, where stress, boredom, and bad examples float in the air thicker than the smoke itself.
Every cigarette feels like a skirmish lost, but every honest attempt to resist is a tiny victory. Some days, it’s easier to pretend the battle doesn’t exist — to light up and forget. Other days, I remember why I started this journal in the first place: because I want more from life than just surviving from one cigarette to the next.
The truth is, quitting isn't about perfection. It's about persistence. Even when it’s messy. Even when it’s slow. Even when you're losing today, but still daring to believe that tomorrow might be different.
It’s not over. Not by a long shot.
The war within is raging — but so am I.
Stay tuned. The story’s not finished yet.
by Dan and Bonkers
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