I’ll admit it, I’ve been slacking a bit on the exercise front. Not totally abandoning it, just… misplacing it temporarily. But honestly, it feels like my support group has been getting a little ambitious with my self-improvement checklist.
Let’s review the facts.
I quit alcohol before I quit smoking.
I quit marijuana before I quit smoking.
That wasn’t accidental. That was intentional. Strategic. Tactical even. I wanted those gone, and I did it.
Now the chorus has shifted.
“Cut out sugar.”
“Cut out caffeine.”
Excuse me?
You took away my Sativa.
You took away my Budweiser.
And now you want to come for my Mountain Dew?
At what point does recovery turn into nutritional hostage negotiation?
Here’s my counter-proposal:
What if I walk to the store for exercise, and then I buy something cold, caffeinated, and unapologetically sugary to wake myself up afterward?
That’s not rebellion. That’s balance.
Mom, in a rare but glorious moment of clarity, finally said it out loud: I’m a grown man, and I can do what I want.
And what this grown man wants…
is a Slurpee.
No smoke.
No booze.
No weed.
Just a plastic cup of frozen chemicals and freedom, earned on foot.
Recovery doesn’t have to mean stripping life down to distilled water and regret. Sometimes it means choosing your battles wisely and enjoying a small, harmless pleasure while you win the big ones.
I didn’t light up today.
I didn’t drink.
I didn’t get high.
But I can get a Slurpee.
And that feels like progress.
I got this. 🥤
by Dan and Bonkers
SUPPORT MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS NOW!!!
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