Cognitive dissonance is a strange mental battlefield, where your beliefs face off against your actions. It’s that nagging tension when you know something is wrong, yet you do it anyway. We often hear about it when beliefs are challenged by social pressures or new information, but for someone quitting smoking, it shows up every time we light up, knowing full well it’s the wrong move.
For me, the challenge has been confronting what I believe about smoking and addiction. Can I truly quit? The answer I want to believe is yes. But there’s this lingering thought that addiction might be stronger than my will. That’s where the dissonance kicks in—my desire to quit is clashing with the reality that I keep sneaking out for a cigarette.
I’m currently in a facility that doesn’t allow smoking. They provide patches, lozenges, and all the tools I need to help quit. Logically, I know these aids are there for a reason, but still, I find myself sneaking off for that secret cigarette. It’s frustrating because my actions are directly challenging my belief in the benefits of quitting. I’ve told people I’m trying to quit, and each time I light up, I feel like I’ve let them down. More importantly, I feel like I’m letting myself down.
What I’ve realized is that until I fully accept quitting as my personal choice—not something I’m doing to appease others—I won’t find real abstinence or inner peace. It’s one thing to want to quit because I know I should; it’s another to want to quit because I genuinely want to be free of it.
The truth is, quitting smoking is hard. But here’s another truth: people do it all the time. It doesn’t mean it happens overnight, and it doesn’t mean the process is smooth. Usually, it takes several attempts. And that much, I can handle—attempting again and again until I get it right. It’s a battle, sure, but each attempt is a step closer to victory. And with each step, the dissonance lessens, and the belief in myself grows.
This is my journey—embracing the challenge and accepting that while my mind might try to trick me, it doesn’t have to win.
by Dan and Bonkers
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Day one. Wish me luck